Hold Me Close
by watchingstarsdie
Summary: It's hard to assume your position on someone's life especially if you don't know how they feel. Flack/Stella/Mac


**set after the last scene on 4x15 DOA for a day**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any characters. **

**CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY**

When she was just on the corridor to his office, she felt a tug of uncertainty in her gut. She looked down and wrung her hands. Shrugging the uncertainty as nothing she continued to her destination. She was a meter from his door when she looked up, a wide smile on her face as she prepared to enter like she always does. And that's when her world stopped and slowly tear apart with each second she stood there.

The smile on her face faltered and her eyes flashed with confusion which was clouded with tears threatening to spill at any moment. She wanted to look away, to turn back and try to convince herself that she saw nothing. Her feet betrayed her for she was rooted to the spot and so did her eyes for she looked everywhere and anywhere but her eyes seem to be drawn to the two people embracing in his office and one of them is the person she intended to visit. Finally, her feet responded to the command her rational mind has been screaming. She walked past his office in a staccato pace using her head of curls to hide the myriad of emotions evident in her face. She needs to hold them back before anyone notices how close she is to breaking down. Running was not an option as long as the crime lab. has her in view for that would raise unwanted questions of concern which is the last thing she wanted. She needed to get out of here. She needed an escape and by luck the emergency exit sign was what she saw when she dared move her gaze up. She headed to the door of the emergency exit hoping it would give her the escape she wanted.

**CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY**

She started running, running from what she saw and from her emotions, as soon as she heard the door shut. She didn't know where she was heading and at that moment she didn't care. The running actually felt good to her, it's as if she can actually escape and leave behind the world and everything in it. She was snapped out of her thoughts when the door she couldn't remember opening snapped shut behind her. She was momentarily stunned at the peaks of skyscrapers that surrounded her. The rooftop. That's where her feet lead her. At the rooftop where he hugged her. Apparently, her subconscious wanted to her to hurt more than she's already hurting.

The image of that woman and him hugging brought back a lot of painful memories but nothing about Frankie, Drew and everything and everyone that has left her scarred could amount to the numbing empty pang she feels in her chest. She wrapped her arms around her as the late afternoon breeze blew around her. She walked to the edge, the breeze swaying her golden locks as the setting sun glistened on her tear-streaked face. She looked ethereal even in her broken-down state. She resembled a goddess like the ones that made her Greek culture.

She has known him for 15 years and even in impulse he never acted as such. Even with Peyton he was private and now she was hugging that woman for the whole crime lab. to see. Hell, for the whole world to see. Even the hug they shared on this rooftop was private. She tilted her head back, attempting to at least minimize the tears cascading freely down her face.

_Damn it!_

Even when she's suppose to be mad at him she just can't because she knows that the only reason that she's hurting is because of herself.

_They were partners. Friends. Bestfriends. Nothing more. It was stupid to think there could or is something more. She had no right to get hurt. She had no claim to him in that way whatsoever. Last time she checked a bestfriend isn't suppose to feel this way when their bestfriend hugs someone. She shouldn't care if he hugged every woman in New York city. It's not suppose to be this way._

Repeating this reasons in her head, however, didn't in any way change the way she felt or even just sooth the numbing pain in her chest which was spreading to her left arm. She slid her eyes shut taking deep breaths to ease the turmoil inside her.

"Stella..." a familiar voice called out.

Her eyes opened at the sound of the voice. Annoyed that her vision was obscured with unshed tears, she tried to swipe them for she didn't want to be seen in her current state she was in but either she was moving slowly or the voice's owner was extremely fast and she chose the latter option for she knew this man and the latter just made more sense. Her hand was only mid-way to her face when her wrist was caught and was held down at her side with a grip that was firm but gentle.

"Stella..."

"I'm fine Don." she replied blinking back tears.

"You can keep telling that to others and to yourself if you want but I'm not buying it." Don said as he grasp her other wrist.

"Don't do this to yourself," Don continued when all that met his words were stiffled sobs. "Stell, I know that--"

"What do you know?!" Stella snapped as she whipped around, breaking his grip, so she now stood facing him.

"Enough." Don replied calmly. "I know enough that if you continue to be hurt like this... you deserve someone better. You've been through enough to be still going through this.

"I know that I'm not suppose to hurt, to fell like this but just seeing them... He was even the one who initiated... I'm such an idiot."

"You're the not an idiot. That's the last thing you are." Don murmured as he pulled her close and engulfed her in a hug. She felt her shiver as she allowed herself to feel everything she's been holding in.

"I thought... well... after everything... I'm so confused... I don't know what to do... It's stupid of me to think that that there could be..." Stella said as she shook her head trying to calm herself and put back her self-control. She would've fallen on her knees for it gave in if it wasn't for Don who held her tighter when he felt the change in her.

"Stell, your not stupid. Listen to me," Don whispered in reply as he stroked her hair. "I care about you. A lot. I'm... I'm your friend and if you need me I'm here. Always."

"Thanks Don." She whispered back as she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. The comforting silence that filled around them was broken by the ringing of a phone. "Do you have to go?"

"Only if you want me too." Don replied as he reached into his pocket and took out his phone. "Do you?" He got his answer from her when she tightened his arms around him. The peaceful silence returned when he turned off his phone and shoved it back in his pocket.

"I'm being selfish. A New Yorker out there might need you to save them." Stella said.

"I think New York can manage without me for a while." Don replied with a smile. " Besides, the New Yorker in my arms is being saved by Don Flack."

"I didn't know heroes had such an ego." She said raising her head from his chest to look at his eyes, her own had some of their usual spark back, and putting it back as she continued, "Thank you... for being you and for being there."

"Always, Stell. That's a promise." He said as he tucked her head underneath his chin and held her closer.

They stood there, engulfed in each others arms. The sun has set and the early-night-time darkness was brightened by the lights emanating from the buildings surrounding them. But both were oblivious to this and to most of the changes in the environment they were in since she first stepped into it. They didn't even notice that the reason for her to find the much need comfort in his arms had seen their entire exchange. Experiencing almost the same pang in the chest as she did in front of his office.

**CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY CSI: NY**

**A/N: Don't know if i will continue or if this is a one-shot. I guess, it depends on my inspiration and motivation. :D One reason that i'm considering this to be a one-shot is that, right now i don't know who i want to pair with Stella. As you might have noticed this is a Mac/Stella/Flack fic. Also if this is to be continued, if you will review please put in your review what you want to happen. I mean if you want the fic to be a: Fiesta or Smacked.**


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